Busy week for me so this one will be more of a quick hitter. If you have not lost faith in me yet then hats off to you, if you are here just to see me predict incorrectly, shame on you. Even a broken clock is right twice a day, remember that. Not sure if that helps me or hurts me? Anyways less talking more predicting, not a lot of time this week so let’s get to the meat and potatoes.
Southampton (1-1-1) vs Manchester United (1-0-2)
Are Southampton class? That is probably not the case, but they are starting 10x better than expected. Young guns keep doing their thing, with a different player deciding to be the hero each week. I am not sure where they end up, I am just along for the ride. JWP had a goal contribution NOT from a set piece, so I am pretty sure the world is ending. United managed to get a wild win against Liverpool on Monday. After their loss to Brentford, I just kind of assumed they were going to give up on the season, props to them for playing all 38 matches. Both clubs are unpredictable right now. The one thing you can predict is goals against, both averaging 2.3 goals against right now. Maybe Casemiro plugs that up a bit for United? I think talent just wins out here. Manchester Utd win their second in a row.
Brentford (1-1-1) vs Everton (0-1-2)
Whirlwind of a start for Brentford. People had them in relegation, they go out and smack around United, then they lose to Fulham. Their attack right now is second in goals scored, but if you have ever had buffalo chicken, the morning after sums up the backline. Everton with no wins under their belt yet, but a whole lot of “they don’t look bad”s from fans watching them play. I guess when expectations are as low as they are, it is hard to disappoint. I am old fashioned; I have a strong belief that you have to score goals to win games. Brentford win here.
Brighton (2-1-0) vs Leeds United (2-1-0)
Battle for top four? Raise your hand if you had both clubs unbeaten through three weeks. Yeah, now put them down you fucking liars. (Seriously, if you did, take over this blog.) It is a battle of defense versus attack. Leeds is averaging 2.3 goals per game; Brighton is only allowing 0.3 goals per game. Brighton have played far more impressive opponents to this point. They have shown they can possess, and they finish like maybe 1% better than last year, so you know, progress. Rodrigo is playing a class above expectations; it is bound to come crumbling down at some point. When that does, they are going to be looking for someone to find the back of the net. Brighton remain unbeaten.
Chelsea (1-1-1) vs Leicester City (0-1-2)
I am going to say it, Tottenham somehow broke Chelsea. They physically bullied them into submission, then Leeds came in and kicked them while they were down. Luckily for them, Leicester have not only been bullied, but have had their pants yanked down in front of the entire cafeteria. As unimpressive as Chelsea have been, Leicester have been a few hundred steps lower than them. Some would call this match the “Battle of Fofana”. I really think they should put up their pink slips (if you have seen Fast & Furious you know) and winner takes the player. Fofana does not have a say though, he sits out the match and must go home with the winning club. If they draw, he must go to the MLS. Sorry, rules are rules. Leicester may not win a match this year, I cannot say with any confidence that I have faith in them. On the other side, Chelsea cannot buy themselves a goal, (No, really, they have tried. Ask Lukaku. And Werner. And Havertz.) yet Leicester might let up three to them. Chelsea bounce back and win.
Liverpool (0-2-1) vs Bournemouth (1-0-2)
We have battles for top four and relegation scraps this early in the season? Building up to be the best season EVER. This is the match, if any, for Liverpool to finally do what everyone expects them to do. Bournemouth are pretty much bottom of the barrel in every stat in the league. They score less than 1 goal per match and allow over 2 goals per match. They barely possess the ball and have a terrible record against Liverpool in the league. Saying all that, they can do the one thing that Liverpool cannot tolerate right now. They can frustrate the hell out of a club. They have not done it in their last two matches, but Arsenal and City are not struggling to score by any means. Liverpool is dying for goals right now and have more injuries than I can count. If there was a match, Bournemouth could steal a point from, it is this one. Draw.
Manchester City (2-1-0) vs Crystal Palace (1-1-1)
I am going to be honest, I forgot how much City struggled against Palace last year. Palace have gotten progressively better each week this year, almost as if they were building up to this match. It is all about the counterattack for them, we saw what they did against Liverpool, they might be able to do it here as well. City showed last week that they are not great at stopping the counter. With wingers like Zaha and Eze to track it could be a tough match. City have yet to be stopped in attack this year, I find it hard to believe it will happen against Palace. I think Palace is a strong side, but City is much stronger. Maybe they get an early goal, but I cannot see them holding on. Manchester City win here.
Arsenal (3-0-0) vs Fulham (1-2-0)
London derby, which I’m pretty sure will happen every week, considering there are seven London clubs. Anyways, what a difference a year makes, last season Arsenal start out with three losses and no goals scored. Now they are sitting on top of the table with three wins, averaging three goals per game, with two clean sheets. I tried to think of a way Fulham could impact this match, I am not sure where to look. Defense is just okay; Arsenal can probably cut that up. Attacking maybe they have a chance, depends really on how Gabriel and Saliba deal with Mitrovic. Only place I can see them having a big impact is in the midfield. The three they play in there have all played very well so far this season. To get anything from this match that is where they need to focus. Even at that, I am not sure I give them a chance here. I don’t think Arsenal have played good enough opponents to truly judge them, but this is not a great test either. Arsenal win.
Aston Villa (1-0-2) vs West Ham United (0-0-3)
Congrats Villa, you beat Everton by one goal, two weeks ago. At least you still have three more points than West Ham. Villa’s start to the season does not really surprise me. They were not that good to end last year, and none of their signings tightened my pants. West Ham have made numerous signings that make my palms sweat, and have done nothing with them. What I am saying here, in my own way, is you are both shit right now. It would be nice just to see West Ham score a goal, start there, and see what happens. According to Declan Rice’s interview after the match, they aren’t winning the league anyways, so pressure is off. Might be time to cash in on him, if that is the attitude he brings, just saying. Defense is in shambles for Villa, strong opportunity for West Ham to get off the mark, Scamacca and Cornet start, or we riot. Nothing about Villa excites me right now, they are the equivalent of microwaved cheese pizza. Draw.
Wolverhampton (0-1-2) vs Newcastle United (1-2-0)
I feel like in my head Wolves are a better team then they really are. Each week I look at their matchup and think, they can get points here. Somehow, they have let me down twice now. Some would say it is because they only scored one goal in three matches, I think those someone’s are onto something. I refuse to ride with them this week out of principle, also because I am ready to die for my club these days. Trippier made me walk around pants less for hours after what he did. If that was not enough to steam your kettle, we go out and dump the truck load of cash on a new striker. Wilson goes down injured, Eddie’s crying in the corner over his broken toy, the owner walks up, places his hand on Eddie’s shoulder and says, “How’d you like this younger, newer toy to play with.” Eddie does not make excuses though, he just tells how it is, love that man. Now he is rewarded with Isak as a striker. Now we can keep scoring goals, keep playing defense, and keep the good times rolling. Newcastle win here.
Nottingham Forest (1-1-1) vs Tottenham (2-1-0)
What are we at now 19 signings and counting? My prediction that Forest would have more signings than points is very much alive right now. They neither score many goals, nor allow many goals. They can walk into this match knowing they have a 5-1-2 record against Tottenham in the PL. Little banter in the tunnel maybe? Tottenham do not want the ball, apparently, they do not want to start matches on time either. If there is one thing, I have seen Forest do this year, it is starting a match quickly. If Forest can score a goal within the first 15 minutes, they have a chance to get points from this one. Although, Tottenham do not play in possession very often, I am not sure if they can break down a deep backline. Forest do like to allow long shots though, if Bissouma is out there I can see him marking when for the top bin. I am going with another one of my double predictions, sort of. Whoever scores first wins this match.
Alright, maybe only a little shorter this week, but we got through all the matches at least. I feel good about this set of predictions. Half the time I forget to pick draw, not this time. Ride with me, and if you cannot do that, at least ride with some of me. If that is too much, at least right with Newcastle. Time to get poor.
Until next time. - SO
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